beautiful rage
I have the best road rage story I have ever had in my entire life...and surprisingly enough, it wasn't I who was enraged!!!
So anyways, Brett and I are driving home from Sacramento, we hav to take different cars because I had to get there way early for the docotr and such. So, we are driving back up I5, it is 2 lanes for all you who are not aware of what I5 looks like outside of Sacramento airport, very very rural. The speed limit is 65, and like a good californian, I am going about 72 or so. I am following brett, we pass this truck, and then he gets over. I am about to get over too because only assholes spend their entire trip in the lefthand lane, but the guy behind me speends up and merges over first. I decide to just merge infront of brett, and I am going like 5 mph faster than him right now anyways, so it will take like 10 seconds. Then this guy tries to jump the gap, try to squeeze between us so he can cut me off. There is no whay he can do this, I wouldhave to break hard core. So I continue to cruise. He has to slam on his breaks to keep from rear ending brett, because he was like doing between 75 and 80. Keep in mind the speed limit is still 65. So he breaks hard, and then swerves into my lane. I am still working on passing brett, but when I see this, I decide to just drop down to like 68 or so. I was going over the speed limit anyways, and this guys is being a cock and almost caused an accident. So yes, i am kinda fucking wioth him, but hardly, because I am like 3 seconds from being able to merge over into the next lane. Then, this crazy guy starts flashing his high beams at me!!!! It is night time, they are reflecting in my mirrow right into my eyes. i am also wearing brand new contacts I just got 6 hours previous, I was supposedd to take them out after 4 hours, and I am not adjusting to the glare from bright lights at night yet, so he is pretty much blinding me. So what must I do? I have to break because of my decreased visibility. Now I am going the speed limit, haha. Then, he blinks them some more because I won't speed up or get over. I can not speed up because I can't see very good, and I can't get over because brett is right there. So he turns on his high beams and just drives with them. I slow down to 60. He is pissed. Laying on his horn, speeding up really close to my bumper, trying to get through the little gap. He turns off his brights, and lucky for him the speed limit increased from 65 to 70. being the good california i am, and seeing now as I can see again, I speed up, with the intention on getting in the right hand lane and letting this crazy dude pass by, I don't really wanna take this game to the next level. But he speeds up even faster, jumps the gap, and pulls up right beside me. Of course, I am having a blast, laughing at how successful our team effort to keep this guy in check because he decided to fuck with us has been, and when he is even with me I roll down my illegally tinted window, and show hime the bird, while laughing hysterically. To my surprise me is not laughing, but he is quite angry. My music is up really really loud, and I can't actually hear what he is saying, but he has huge hand motions where neither hand is on the sterring wheel, and he is flipping me off and motioning me to pull over my car? So he can do what? beat me for not going 15 miles over the speed limit so he could get to where ever he is goin 5 seconds faster? So I can get pulled over by the CHP? I just keep laughing and rolling up my window, the dark tint conviniently puts me in my own little world. He speeds up, and now the coast seems to be clear, I get over. So he breaks. Like I care that we are no going 65. He is the one in the hurry, not me! I laugh because he is so mad, he is probably making himself late by trying to fuck with me. I slow down, never tailgating, keeping proper driving stiquette. He starts signaling for me to get over on the shoulder. I am like hell no! and I signal to get in the left hand lane because a truck is coming up. He immediately swerves and signals to lane change thinking this is going to inconvinience me, which it dosen't, I still have 2 hours worth of driving ahead of me, and the fact that both brett and I are fucking with him now, it is very very entertaining. The harder this guy tries, the hard we are laughing. Finally, he getts in the left hand lane. Brett is now in that lane because I was going slow, being behind a truck, but not close behind, a wats behind but I hate speeding up behind trucks, i like to give them lots of room to see me merging. Brett pulls up right behind this dude and flashes his brights. Crazy road rages sees we are together, puts an end to all his plans to try to run me off th road or whatever, and speeds off.
Someone else's anger has never felt so rewarding. And we did so without breaking the law! How sweet is that! (except for me being like 7 or 8 mph over the speedlimit, but Ren't those law suggestive guidelines any?)
Well, it wasn't quite a subway story, but I am sure that today might produce something promising for you all. Doctor's appointments went extremely well considering, I got my referals and my new doctor looks like an actor from a spanish soap opera. I love it! hopefully I get my class from my respective referals, and they can tell me ways of fixing my foot with surgery (I fear this is not going to bet he case). Oh, and I am a contact wearer now, if you didn't pick that up earlier, so I guess that appointment went well. My advice to people who need an exam for contacts: Costco does eye exams for half the price of kaiser, and the contacts are cheap and have a 30 dollar rebate. Woot to costco!
So yeah, work and laundry and all that good stuff. Enjoy the commercials for me, I am sadly working on this fine national holiday.
2004-02-01 | 8:53 a.m.