Back in the game!
I think I am finally ready to date again. The past few months I have been weary and have just wanted the company more than the relationship. Not that it mattered because no one else wanted that. But, I finally feel less pessimistic towards the idea and I think that if I give it a chance there might possibly be someone out there who will treat me fabulous and make me feel like I am the most gorgeous, most intelligent, most important person in the world. I will find someone who will make me think that love really can exist.
I guess the way I look at it; I have very strong feelings for people in my life who are probably the most wonderful friends I will ever have in my life, so why can’t I find that romantically in someone else.
I know this is opening myself up to get my heart all walked over, but I think I am ready. And I am going to be smart about it this time and I am going to find someone who is truly excited to be with me. I see other people in relationships and I want that. I didn’t used to want it because all the pain that comes with it was just too fresh. But I realize I don’t ever just ant to have sex with someone to satisfy myself….that in fact I crave the relationship and that sex would just be a nice perk…so this means I am going to make myself emotionally available. No more talk about Brett. No more talk about Cory. No more talk about how long it has been since I have gotten any. Just me and none of that nasty baggage. I am dropping it right here, right now.
2005-01-22 | 6:59 p.m.